The past two years have been the hardest years of my life. I found myself navigating a part of me I didn’t even know existed, and while those years were full of stress and pain, they ultimately became the years that shaped me, the years that made me stronger.
2022 was by far the toughest. Everything was new. I was overwhelmed with stress, so much so that my mind couldn’t handle it anymore, and I experienced a mental breakdown. This happened just a few weeks after giving birth, and just a month later, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression.
During that dark time, my first question was, “Am I even good enough to raise this child?” I felt worthless, always trapped in sadness that had no apparent cause. The smallest tasks felt overwhelming. Even something as simple as taking a bath felt like climbing a mountain. Can you imagine how everything else felt?
Every aspect of my life was filled with stress. It got to a point where the simplest things, like cooking, triggered intense anxiety. I remember one day vividly: I was cutting onions in the kitchen, and I left to get something from another room. By the time I returned, I couldn’t find the knife. Just like that, stress flooded in. My heart started racing, sweats kicked in, and a pounding headache followed.
Can you picture that image?
If something as small as misplacing a knife could cause that level of panic, imagine what larger challenges felt like. The stress was unbearable—worse is an understatement.
When I could no longer bear it, I decided to seek help. I started therapy, joined support groups, and started doing intense research. I refused to let stress control me any longer. It took another year to start feeling like myself again, but I made it through.
Today, I want to share with you seven strategies that helped me cope with stress. These are the same strategies I have been using till now, and they’ve been life-changing. They help me navigate stressful situations more easily and find solutions instead of feeling overwhelmed.
Are you ready to discover how you can remain calm in stressful situations?
Let’s dive in.
1. Letting go of what you can’t control
One of the things I learned the hardest way is to let go of what I can’t control.
From childhood, I struggled with always wanting to make everything right, which worsened as I grew up. I obsessed over everything that went wrong(even the little ones), whether it was someone’s negative opinion of me or situations that didn’t go the way I planned. The constant worry and frustration always left me feeling drained. I found myself trapped in a cycle of trying to fix things that were beyond my control, and it only heightened my stress.
Through therapy and deep reflection, I realized that holding on to these uncontrollable factors was not only harming my mental health but also preventing me from focusing on the things that were within my
power to change. The more I clung to what I couldn’t control, the more I lost sight of what I could do to improve my situation.
Letting go doesn’t mean giving up. It means accepting that some things are out of your hands and instead choose to redirect your energy to what truly matters—your response to the situation. This shift in mindset gave me a sense of peace and clarity. I stopped wasting energy on the uncontrollable and instead focused on productive actions that brought me closer to my goals. It’s not easy, and I still have to remind myself of this lesson daily, but it has made a difference in my ability to cope with stress.
By releasing the need to control everything, I found freedom. I started to trust the process and embrace uncertainty. As I began to let go of what is beyond me, I became more confident in handling what is within my reach. This is one of the most valuable strategies I’ve learned, and it helped me deal with stress and approach challenges with a clearer mind. If you often struggle with stress, you can give it a try.
2. Journaling
The second thing that has been instrumental in helping me cope with stress is journaling. At first, I was skeptical about it. How can writing down my thoughts really make a difference? I thought. But once I gave it a try, I realized it was much more than just putting pen to paper—it became my safe space.
In the midst of chaos, journaling gave me an outlet to release all the emotions I had been bottling up inside for the first time without worrying about being judged. Instead of letting stress, frustration, or sadness swirl around in my head, I now pour them onto the page. It is like a pressure valve for my mind, slowly releasing the overwhelming thoughts preventing them from consuming me.
These past years taught me that journaling isn’t just about venting. It’s also about gaining clarity. When everything feels like it’s spinning out of control, writing down my thoughts helps me see things from a different perspective. It turns the abstract feelings of stress into something tangible I can address. Once it’s written down, I can begin to make sense of what’s really going on.
Some days, I would write about the smallest frustrations—the things that seemed trivial but were adding up to a mountain of stress. Other days, I would journal about deeper fears and anxieties that were harder to express out loud. No matter what I write about, it always feels like a release, and afterward, I feel lighter.
One of the most powerful aspects of journaling is that it also allows me to track my progress. Looking back at my entries from months ago, I could see how far I had come. When I started using this technique, I noticed patterns in my stress triggers and started recognizing what works for me in managing stressful situations and what doesn’t work.
Over time, journaling became my go-to strategy whenever stress started to creep in. It has become a habit that not only helps me cope in the moment but also helps me reflect and grow. Now, whenever I feel overwhelmed, I reach for my journal(I prefer a digital one nowadays), knowing that it’s a tool that will help me find peace amid the chaos.
If you’re looking for a simple yet powerful way to handle stress, I encourage you to try journaling. You don’t need to be a writer or follow any rules—just start by jotting down whatever comes to mind. It might just surprise you how much it helps.
3. Deep breathing
This is the simple technique that changed my life. When my therapist first suggested deep breathing as a way to manage stress, I was skeptical. Honestly, I almost laughed. I remember thinking, “Really? How is breathing supposed to help me with all this stress? I need something bigger, more powerful than just breathing!” But as it turned out, I was wrong.
At first, I dismissed the idea. Deep breathing seemed too simple to make any real difference, but I was at a point where I was willing to try anything. On one particularly stressful day, I gave it a shot. I sat down, closed my eyes, and followed my therapist’s instructions: “Breathe in deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly through your mouth.”
To my surprise, something shifted. After just a few tries, I felt a subtle calm washing over me. My racing thoughts slowed down, and the tension in my body began to ease. It wasn’t a magic fix, but at that moment, I realized that deep breathing is much more powerful than I thought.
I learned that deep breathing does more than just help you relax—it helps you regain control over your body when stress takes over. When you’re stressed, your body goes into fight-or-flight mode, causing your heart rate to increase and your muscles to tense up. Deep breathing activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which signals your body to calm down. It’s a physiological response, not just a mental trick like I thought at first.
The more I practiced, the more I realized that this simple technique was making a huge difference. Whether I was feeling overwhelmed by a task or caught in an anxious spiral, deep breathing became a reliable way to center myself and regain a sense of calm. It is a tool I could use anywhere, anytime—whether I am in the car, at home, or even in another stressful situation.
One of the most important lessons I took away from this experience is that sometimes, the simplest things we neglect bring the greatest, life-changing impact. It’s easy to overlook something as basic as breathing, but once I embraced it, I saw how profound its effects could be. Now, deep breathing is one of my go-to strategies for coping with stress, and I continue to practice it regularly.
If you’re feeling skeptical like I once was, I encourage you to try it. You might be surprised by how something as simple as deep breathing can help you regain your sense of calm and control in even the most stressful situations.
4. Reframing your perspective
Another most powerful strategy I learned while dealing with stress is the art of reframing my perspective. When I was going through the toughest moments of my life, it felt like everything was falling apart. I was stuck in a cycle of negative thinking, seeing only the challenges and the pain. But as I started to heal, I realized something profound: every situation, no matter how difficult, has both a positive and a negative side—and how we feel depends on which side we choose to focus on.
This wasn’t an easy shift to make. At first, it felt unnatural to look for the positive when all I could see was the weight of my struggles. But as I practiced, I started to notice a difference in how I felt and how I responded to stress. Instead of automatically reacting with frustration or despair, I learned to pause and ask myself, “What can I learn from this? How might this challenge help me grow?”
Reframing doesn’t mean ignoring the negative or pretending everything is fine. It’s about acknowledging the difficulty but choosing to focus on the opportunities for growth, resilience, or even gratitude. For example, during my postpartum depression, I felt overwhelmed and powerless. But over time, I began to see that the experience was teaching me patience, self-compassion, and the importance of seeking help when needed.
There’s a lot of power in reframing because it puts you back in control of your thoughts. When stress hits, our minds often fixate on the worst-case scenario. We start thinking, “This is too much,” or, “I’ll never get through this.” But reframing allows you to challenge those thoughts and see the situation from a different angle. Instead of thinking, “I can’t handle this,” you can reframe it as, “This is tough, but I’ve handled tough situations before, and I can get through this too.”
The more I practiced reframing, the more I realized that stress is often magnified by our perception of it. When we focus on what’s going wrong, the stress feels heavier. But the situation becomes more manageable when we actively look for the lesson or the potential for growth. Reframing doesn’t make the stress disappear, but it helps to reduce its impact and gives you the strength to keep moving forward.
Whenever I face a stressful situation, I ask myself a simple question: “What’s the other side of this story?” This helps me shift my focus from the negative and find a more balanced, empowering perspective. Whether it’s a minor inconvenience or a big life challenge, reframing has become one of my most valuable tools for dealing with stress.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, try reframing your perspective. You might not be able to change the situation, but you can always change how you see it—and that can make a big difference.
5. Talking to someone
The fifth most significant strategy I’ve discovered for managing stress is talking to someone you trust. There is power in sharing your struggles.
I used to be a “ME” person who kept everything bottled up out of fear of judgment. The idea of opening up to others seemed daunting, and I worried that they wouldn’t understand or would criticize me. But keeping everything bottled up was slowly eating me.
During the height of my struggles, I was suffering in silence. Even my family had no idea what I was going through. It felt like I was carrying a heavy burden alone, and its weight was almost unbearable. It was during one of these low points that my therapist gave me a challenge: “I need you to open up to someone outside of our sessions.” “But I already shared everything with you. Why do I need to talk to someone else?” I said worriedly.
With a gentle smile, my therapist adjusted her glasses and said, “Yes, you have me now, but I won’t always be here for you. This is only temporary. It’s important for you to build a support network beyond these walls.” Her words were a mix of comfort and a push towards self-reliance, but I was afraid.
I was beyond terrified. It took every ounce of strength I had to start reaching out and sharing my experiences. But something shifted as I began to talk about what I was going through. The act of speaking out loud made my struggles feel more manageable. I wasn’t alone in my pain anymore; I had others who were willing to listen and support me, totally different from what I thought.
The hardest part was starting. Once I overcame that initial hurdle, I found that sharing my thoughts and feelings didn’t make me weak or vulnerable—it made me human. It allowed me to connect with others on a deeper level and gain insights and support that I wouldn’t have received otherwise.
At that moment, this old saying, “A problem shared is half solved,” truly resonated with me. Talking to someone helped me see my problems from a different perspective and made me realize that I didn’t have to face everything alone. It provided relief, validation, and often practical advice or simply the comfort of knowing that someone cared.
If you’re struggling with stress and feeling isolated, I encourage you to reach out and talk to someone you trust. It can be a friend, a family member, or even a support group. Sharing your burdens might be difficult at first, but it can lead to profound relief and support. Remember, you don’t have to carry the weight of your struggles alone.
CONCLUSION
Remember, navigating stress is an inevitable part of life, but how we manage it can make all the difference. Through my journey, I’ve discovered several transformative strategies that have helped me cope and thrive: letting go of what I can’t control to focus on what matters, journaling to express emotions and gain clarity, deep breathing to calm my mind and body, reframing my perspective to see challenges as opportunities for growth, and talking to someone to break isolation and find support. Each technique has proven invaluable in managing stress and improving my overall well-being, allowing me to approach life’s difficulties with a more balanced and resilient mindset.
If you’re facing challenges, I encourage you to explore these strategies and see how far they will help you cope. You don’t have to believe it first; just try each approach and see what works for you!